


Don't Be A Fuck Up, Dean

by hglndlassie



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Adult Dean Winchester, Alternate Universe - Human, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Bad Parent John Winchester, Bad Parent Mary Winchester, Bisexual Dean Winchester, Bottom Castiel (Supernatural), Bottom Castiel/Top Dean Winchester, Bottom Dean Winchester, Castiel/Dean Winchester First Kiss, Dean Winchester Has Self-Worth Issues, Domestic Castiel/Dean Winchester, Domestic Fluff, Emotional Hurt, Emotionally Hurt Dean Winchester, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Happy Ending, Human Castiel (Supernatural), Hurt Dean Winchester, Hurt/Comfort, John Winchester's A+ Parenting, Kissing, Lawyer Castiel (Supernatural), Lawyer Sam Winchester, M/M, Mechanic Dean Winchester, POV Dean Winchester, Partier Dean Winchester, Poor Life Choices, Poor drunk life choices, Possessive Castiel (Supernatural), Romance, Soulless Sam Winchester, Switching, Therapy, They come around in the end, Top Castiel (Supernatural), Top Castiel/Bottom Dean Winchester, Top Dean Winchester, Yoga, dean winchester likes flowers
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-03
Updated: 2021-03-10
Packaged: 2021-03-16 05:01:11
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 13,099
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29819790
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hglndlassie/pseuds/hglndlassie
Summary: Dean has lived the party life for several years, but when he wakes up after a night out that he can’t remember it forces him to reevaluate his priorities.  He decides to make some changes which lead him to meeting someone during his new yoga class.  As Dean continues to improve his life and act more like a responsible adult, he becomes happier.  Having his new boyfriend, Cas, to support him along the way doesn’t hurt either.  When his family is unable to recognize or appreciate the changes Dean has made, Cas helps him to understand who he is and proves that sometimes your chosen family can see you more clearly than anyone else.
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester, Dean Winchester/Other(s), Ellen Harvelle/Bobby Singer, Jessica Moore/Sam Winchester, John Winchester/Mary Winchester, past Dean Winchester/Lisa Braeden
Comments: 25
Kudos: 57





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I'm branching out! Something I wrote a while ago and have been finishing up and updating. Let me know what you think about this one. I love comments!
> 
> Also, no beta, so please let me know if there are mistakes to fix.

**DEAN POV**

Dean groaned when he cracked his eyes open. The light filtering from the window blinded him. He wasn’t sure if it was late in the day or if the hangover he certainly had made it worse. He clutched his head as he rolled over only to be met with a solid, well defined back. He squinted one eye and tried to focus. Dean thought back to the night before. He tried to remember how he got in bed with such a nicely built man as the one he was staring at, but the memories were fuzzy. 

He lifted himself up on his elbow and glanced around. It was definitely not his place. He took in the well-furnished room with the expensive furniture and plush carpet. The down comforter covering his naked form was soft and fluffy.

Damn, he really wished he could remember how he ended up in this nice of a place. He shook his head and wiped a hand down his face. It wasn’t the first time he had woken up in a stranger’s bed. He didn’t say for breakfast though, so he blinked the sleep from his eyes and let them adjust further to the light.

He took another look around, checking for his clothes, when he suddenly stopped. His gut clenched. Opposite of the bed was a nice dresser filled with jewelry, perfumes and things that screamed that a woman lived in this room. 

Dean quickly looked over the guy’s back to check his hand and sure enough, there on the left finger was a solid gold wedding band. Dean let his head fall back onto his shoulders and stared at the ceiling.

Dean did not sleep with married dudes or chicks. He must have been really fucked up. He pulled his head back up and shook it slightly. He decided that it was time for him to make a graceful and quiet exit. He turned on his opposite side only to freeze half way around.

Blond hair spilled over the pillow case on his other side. He could see a lovely woman, who’s curves were defined and on full display. She lay naked, blankets kicked off, eye makeup smudged, right next to Dean.

He felt slightly better that he hadn’t fucked a married man without his wife knowing, but he wasn’t sure how he ended up in bed with not one, but two partners. Dean shifted a bit, putting some pressure on his ass and winced. They must have had a good time last night for his ass to be that sore. He hoped he hadn’t been reckless and had used the condoms that he kept in his wallet.

He shook his head at himself. It was passed time to go. 

He carefully pulled the blankets off of himself, thankful that the chick didn’t have anything covering her to accidentally pull down and wake her. He crawled as quickly as he could over the bed without shaking the mattress too much.

Once he was standing next to the bed he grabbed his clothes that were strewn all over the floor and made a hasty retreat. He threw them on as he made his way down the hall and stairs to the first floor. Thankfully his keys and wallet were still in his pants pockets and he spied his boots in the hallway at the front door. 

Dean slipped his feet into them, not bothering to lace them up, and unlocked the door. He wasn’t sure if he hoped the Impala was parked out front or not. If he had driven here that drunk, he was a fucking idiot and damn lucky he didn’t kill himself or someone else.

He closed the door as quietly as he could and turned. His shoulders sagged as he saw the Impala on the curb. Dean clenched his jaw in disappointment at himself and made his way down the walk and to the car. He didn’t care about making noise now as he threw open the front door and started up the growling engine. He had no idea where he was but he didn’t want to hang around, so he put the car in drive and pulled out onto the street. He would pull over and use his GPS to get home if he needed to.

Dean ran his hand through his hair as he made a turn and spied the exit of the subdivision. He pulled out onto the main road and headed for home. He needed ibuprofen and a greasy breakfast. 

***

After a long hot shower where Dean continued to discover just how much fun he had last night, he popped three pain pills and downed a full glass of water before he set his alarm for work and passed out for a few more hours.

When the alarms rang he was still hung over. He slapped at his phone and the song stopped. He nuzzled into the pillow and dozed until the alarm blared again. He grunted and pulled himself up to sit on the side of the bed. His head pounded and the pulsing behind his eyes hadn’t lessened with sleep. 

He managed to drag himself out of bed and back into the bathroom. He brushed his teeth again, even though he had brushed them when he showered earlier. He slapped at his cheeks and tried to put some color in them. His skin was pale and the purple bags under his eyes told the story of the night before. He slapped the light off after finger combing his hair.

He dressed in his polo and khakis and headed straight for the pain medication on the kitchen counter. He repeated the pill dosage and water while his coffee brewed. It was nearly noon, but he needed the wake up.

He poured his coffee, locked the door and headed to work. The routine was familiar and he functioned on autopilot as he made his way through the city. He pulled into Singer Salvage and Mechanics right after lunch. He parked the Impala out front where it could be seen from the road and locked her up.

The bell rang over the door as he walked in, the sound dancing around his brain making him cringe. Krissy was seated at the counter talking with a customer. She smirked at him knowingly. There were a few others waiting in the lounge connected to the front so he didn’t stop. He waved to her as he walked through the connecting door into the bay area.

There were four bays that they had full with the salvage yard in the back. Dean had practically grown up here with his uncle Bobby. Bobby was his dad’s best friend and had really taken Dean under his wing when he showed an interest in cars. He had helped his dad get him the Impala to restore when he was sixteen and had taught him everything he knew about cars. Dean once told his dad that he worried his father would be disappointed that he didn’t follow in his footsteps to be a police officer, but his dad said he was happy Dean was happy. 

Bobby gave him his first job in high school and he had encouraged him to get his associates degree in business at the community college. Dean had barely managed to do it, but Bobby had made him his full-time manager as soon as he had that degree. He had hinted that Dean should try and enroll in a four-year program to get his bachelors but Dean didn’t see a reason to. He was happy running the shop for Bobby. He could help with the management, the books and customers but still jump under the hood of a car when he wanted to.

Dean glanced around to see how things were going before he headed to Bobby’s office to tell him he was here. Dean usually worked a swing shift on Friday in order to do the payroll and still be able to jump into a bay if needed. Fridays could be a rush sometimes when people came in to get their cars looked over before the weekend. He was off on Saturday and Sunday, which he loved and had gotten used to very quickly.

After he was sure everything looked good and there were no issues he knocked on Bobby’s open door before stepping in.

“Hey Bobby,” he greeted. Bobby glanced up from his paperwork piled on the desk and did a double take.

“What the hell happened to you?” he questioned. Dean ran a hand down his face and grimaced. He was still short on sleep and had obviously been partying hard.

“Had a good time last night,” he mumbled with a shrug. Dean knew he looked bad in spite of the extra sleep he got at home. His head was still pounding and he made a note to set his phone alarm when he could take more pain medicine.

“Sure, seems like it,” Bobby nodded. “You look like hell, Dean.”

“Yea, I feel like it too,” he confessed. And not just physically. Waking up with absolutely no memory of the previous night, with not one, but two partners was something he had never done before. His stomach clenched when he continued to think about the fact that he had driven from the bar to their house while he was drunk enough not to remember it.

“Maybe you should tone the partying down a little, son. It was Thursday,” Bobby told him as he leaned back in his chair.

“Yea, well, I’m fine. I’m on time and I’ll be in my office doing payroll and invoices for the week.”

Bobby frowned at him but said nothing else. Dean took that as his cue to leave and went next door to his own office. It looked much like Bobby’s only his computer was more up to date and his piles were organized by files and a clear system. Dean had everything labeled and sorted, ready to be entered and gone through. 

Dean sat down to go through the weekly paperwork, a familiar routine for him. His head hurt and his eyes were blurry but he wasn’t going to give Bobby the satisfaction of being right. He chugged the last of his coffee and turned on his computer. He organized the paperwork he needed to start the invoices while he waited.

He tried to keep his mind off of the previous night, but he couldn’t help thinking about it. He tried to remember anything after he had taken the three shots at the bar but he couldn’t. Two blonds had offered to buy him a few drinks and he was up for it, so he had ordered the shots. If anything, he would have expected to wake up in bed with them. How, then, did he end up with the other couple?

Dean didn’t like the anxious, hollow feeling it left in him. He sent another thank you into the air for whoever or whatever had kept him from killing himself or someone else the night before and tried to refocus on his task. He worked well and thought that things might actually go well for him that day.

An hour later he banged his head down on the desk.

He instantly regretted the action because his head felt like his brain was going to explode, but it was nothing compared to the mistake he just found. He had fucked up on one of the invoices and it would be the rest of the day to undo the damage. He spent the next two hours trying to correct the mistake with the customer and the parts company before it was fixed. In the end it probably meant they lost a customer and were definitely getting a shitty online review, but it could have been worse. He made his way over to Bobby to confess the mistake and tell him what he had done to fix it.

“What do you mean it was a five-hundred-dollar mistake?” Bobby nearly yelled. To say he was unimpressed was an understatement. 

Dean rubbed the back of his neck in embarrassment. “I’m sorry, Bobby. I just mixed up the invoice numbers and we charged the wrong amount.” Dean felt bad, but it had been an honest mistake. 

Or he thought.

“You idjit, you came in looking worse on Monday than you do right now. Who knows what you did while you were in that state. I shouldn’t have even let you stay. Only reason I didn’t send you home was because you weren’t getting under the hood of a car.” Bobby took off his cap and ran his hand through his hair. 

Dean realized that he had still been slightly drunk on Monday morning when he came to work. He had Charlie drop him off that morning because he couldn’t drive. Well, at least he hadn’t driven drunk that time.

Which reminded him of his stupidity from last night once again. He wasn’t usually so irresponsible, especially when he could hurt other people. His self-destructive behavior usually only affected him. 

“I know, and I’m sorry for it, Bobby,” Dean told him. He was, too. Dean wasn’t usually one to screw up at work, especially when it came to money. He knew that everyone made mistakes sometimes, even the expensive ones, but Bobby was right. He probably shouldn’t have been working and he had cost the old man a lot of money because of it.

“Alright, well I’m sure you have other things to be getting on with now,” Bobby replied. It was a clear dismissal and Dean didn’t need to be told twice. It took a lot for Bobby to get angry, but Dean could see he was on the verge of it. He beat a hasty retreat to his own office once more.

He spent the rest of the afternoon fielding phone calls, working on payroll and problem solving with one of the mechanics about an issue on a Toyota. When he locked the doors at eight he breathed a sigh of relief.

His head had felt better the longer the day went on but he had a heavy feeling in the pit of his stomach that he didn’t know what to do with. Last night had shaken him up. He double checked the safe, shut off the lights and locked up before he headed home.

He would usually just stop in to change his clothes before heading back out to a bar but tonight he just didn’t feel like it. He chalked it up to the fact that he had partied harder during the week than he normally did and decided to just crash when he got home.

His small house in an older neighborhood was something he was proud of, even if he didn’t have a lot of time to take care of it. He had been able to put a good down payment on it and purchase it when Bobby had promoted him to manager. It was small, but it was a good fit for Dean. He had a nice open concept first floor, even if it was just one big room that was a kitchen with a bar and eat in nook that fed into a living room. There were three small bedrooms and two bathrooms upstairs.

He smiled at the familiar squeak of the car door as it opened and shut. He made his way through the dark to his porch where he had remembered to leave the light on. He quickly unlocked the door, any remaining energy quickly draining out of him now that he was home.

When he stepped into the house he wrinkled his nose. His place was wrecked. There were empty beer bottles and pizza boxes everywhere. The coffee table and bar were littered with take out boxes and more empty liquor bottles. Dean tossed his keys on the small table by the door before toeing off his boots and hanging up his leather jacket. It was getting warmer during the day but the evenings in April still carried a chill.

He decided to take a quick shower to wash off the smell of the shop and get some food. He quickly showered, changed and was back downstairs staring at his empty fridge in twenty minutes. There was a bottle of ketchup, a container of Chinese food he couldn’t remember putting in there and a fruit drawer full of beer bottles.

He shut the door in disgust and opened the freezer. There were three bottles of liquor and a frozen pizza. Dean sighed and grabbed the pizza, leaving the booze.

As the oven preheated he grabbed a large black trash bag from under the sink and began to clean up the kitchen. He filled two of the bags before he moved to the living room. There he filled another one. When they were all in the large can behind his house the pizza was almost done. 

Dean wiped down the kitchen and his coffee table while his dinner finished up. He pulled the steaming pizza from the oven with limited enthusiasm and set it on the top of the stove. He braced his hands on the counter surrounding the appliance and stared at the pizza, his mind going over the events of the day again and again. 

He finally pulled his thoughts back to the present and sliced up the pizza. He automatically reached for a beer from the fridge but decided at the last minute that he would just get a glass of water. He filled it from the tap and settled on the couch to eat and watch Netflix.

He quickly discovered that he didn’t really have an appetite and just decided to give up and go to bed. He wrapped the unfinished food and placed it in the fridge for the next day before he dragged himself up the stairs and crawled into bed. He was more than exhausted but sleep eluded him. He tossed and turned until the early hours of the morning before he finally fell into a deep sleep.

When he woke on Saturday he felt more rested, but the melancholy feeling was still with him. He lay in bed for a while as he let his thoughts drift. He thought about the past week, his drinking, his bar hopping, his desire to chase and fuck anyone that looked appealing. He thought about how he had felt yesterday morning and all through the day. He thought about how he hadn’t really been happy for a while, he just continued to try and find happiness by drinking and sleeping his way through every bar in town.

How had he gotten here? He had always been a bit wild. His dad tried to reign him in several times but Dean went off the rails a bit in high school and never righted himself completely. His life had been a steady stream of male and female lovers, coupled with an alcohol problem and the attitude of a teenager, in spite of being twenty-nine. 

Things had taken a sharp turn for the worse when Lisa had left him five years ago. Dean felt a small tug in his heart at the memory of her. When they first got together he thought that maybe they could be the real deal. He could see a future together with her. In the end, he wasn’t good enough for her and she left.

He had come home to find her bags packed and by their apartment door. She looked nervous, but not sad. Dean had known immediately that they were done. He had known if for a few months, but he thought she would at least have left him before she found someone else. It turned out that she _had_ found someone else and they were going to make a go of a relationship because of the baby she was carrying. Dean knew for certain that the kid wasn’t his because they had been in a dry spell for a few months.

Dean hadn’t even put up a fight, he just let her go. He got blind drunk that night and had continued on ever since. He hadn’t been good enough for a long-term relationship, so he’d just stick to the one-night stands. Alcohol numbed him from the pain and sex felt good, so it was a winning combination. Dean wasn’t that sad about the break up, it was the fact that he had another failed relationship. They had been together for three years at that point. She had cheated on him with someone else and got pregnant. It ate at him that he hadn’t been good enough for her to even break up with him if she wanted out.

He would probably be even worse off by now if Bobby hadn’t put him to work and made him take those classes. He’d probably be tending bar and living in a shitty apartment with a roommate.

Dean was glad that he didn’t have that life, but he wasn’t satisfied any longer with the one he was living either. He had slowly been coming to that realization over the last few months but he didn’t know how to fix it.

His phone rang then and he reached over to the nightstand to grab it. He smiled an swiped the screen.

“What’s up bitch?” he asked. Though Dean had been awake for a while, he hadn’t gotten up or used his voice so it sounded more like a croak.

“Dude, you sound like you’re still sleeping,” Sam’s voice admonished. 

“Well good morning to you too,” Dean snapped. He ran a hand down his face and back into his hair.

“Are you still in bed? It’s almost not morning, Dean,” Sam continued. Dean glanced at the clock and it was almost noon.

“I’ve been awake for a while, just laying in bed thinking,” he told his brother. Sam snorted on the other end of the phone and Dean frowned at the dismissal.

“Ok, Dean, whatever. Are you alone? Can you talk for a minute?”

“Am I alone? Of course, I’m alone,” he said. 

“Well, it’s a valid question, Dean. I’ve called before when your last conquest has still been there.”

Ok, true. Dean had to admit that it might have happened a time or two. “Fair point,” he told Sam, “but I am alone. I stayed in last night.”

Sam paused. “Are you sick?” he asked. Dean could detect a faint note of worry in his tone.

“What?” Dean asked. He sat up and threw the covers back. He swung his legs of the edge of the bed and stretched. “No, man, I’m good. I just had a rough day yesterday and didn’t feel like going out so I stayed home.”

“Wow, that must have been some day,” his brother remarked.

“Yea, it kinda sucked. First- “

“Oh hey, so listen, I actually called to talk to you about something.” Sam cut him off mid-sentence. Dean swallowed his words, deciding not to say anything about his brother’s rudeness. “I got assigned a new case this week,” he continued. “I’m working on a new part of corporate law I haven’t done before. I’m super excited about it and I think it’s going to be good for my career. I’m working with one of the senior partners on this, so if I impress him he could put in a good word for me. This could really make me stand out, Dean.”

“Wow, Sammy, that sounds like a great opportunity for you. What kind of case is it?” Dean asked.

“It’s a lawsuit between a corporation and the city over building rights and code. You wouldn’t understand it,” Sam dismissed him.

“Oh,” Dean murmured, feeling stung. “Well, I guess if you say so,” he told him. “Got to use that big brain,” Dean said, trying to brush it off and joke around to cover his hurt.

“Yea, at least one of us got one,” Sam scoffed. 

Dean’s eyebrows rose to the top of his hairline in surprise. Since when was his brother on such a high horse? Before he could reply to that insult Sam continued.

“Well, I just wanted to tell you about it. I gotta go though, Jess and I are heading to lunch with some friends. We’re going to check out that new bistro downtown.”

Bistro? Who the fuck was this kid?

Dean must have been silent too long because his brother was talking again.

“Dean, you still there? I’m talking to you, man.”

Dean licked his lips before he spoke. “Yea, I’m here Sam. I hope you guys enjoy lunch. Let me know how it is, maybe I’ll check it out.”

“Ha! I don’t think it’s your kinda place, Dean,” his brother said coolly. “I’ll talk to you soon.” 

The line went dead before he could say good-bye. Dean sat on his bed for a few minutes just staring down at his phone, wondering if that conversation just happened or if he was still dreaming. The flashing numbers on the screen indicating the short phone call convinced him it had really happened.

Dean tried to shake off the uncomfortable feeling in his stomach by putting some food in to fill it up. He ate the leftover pizza cold while he stood at the counter. He went over the week, his poor choices, his drinking, the mistake at work and the way his brother spoke to him. He didn’t feel good about his life any more. 

He wanted to make some changes, but he wasn’t sure how. He decided that he would start with the basics like a shower and shave. Then, he thought as he glanced around to the empty cabinets, maybe the grocery store.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for all the love! I love reading your comments. Hope you enjoy.

**CHAPTER 2- DEAN POV**

Dean did, in fact, shower and shave. He put on a clean pair of his good jeans along with a black t-shirt and a green flannel. He did his hair, laced up his boots and donned his leather jacket. He had made a grocery list before he got himself ready, so he grabbed it off the counter and locked up.

He went to fill up his Baby with gas first before hitting the grocery store that was closest to his house. He took his time there, really looking at what they had and what meals he could make. Once upon a time he had been the cook of the house he shared with Lisa. He purchased plenty of snacks and staples. He decided that he wanted to eat healthier and cut back on the junk and take out. The box of apple pie Pop Tarts didn’t count. He should be able to treat himself, even now.

He grabbed toilet paper and toothpaste and headed to the check out. Before he knew it, he had put everything away at home and felt good.

“Ok,” he muttered out loud as he looked around the kitchen. “I’m groomed, I’m ready to eat healthy, what else do responsible adults do on the weekend?”

The answer was obvious once he really took a look around. The house was dirty. Not in the all my worldly possessions are all over the place messy, but as in there’s food spilled all over the counter and haven’t vacuumed in six months dirty.

He made a face and crouched down to see what cleaning supplies he had under the sink. He found some things that would get him started for today but made a mental note to write down some supplies for the next time he was out.

He chuckled to himself as he rose and put everything on the counter. Look at him, making a list, being responsible with chores. He pulled out his phone and turned on the music, connecting it to his sound system.

Metallica blared through the speaker as he scrubbed down the kitchen counters and sink. He wiped the cabinets and trash can. He swept and mopped the tile floor before he got the vacuum out of the downstairs closet and vacuumed the sofa and chairs, the curtains and finally the carpet. He attached the duster to the vacuum and got all the dust gathering on the surfaces and in the fixtures.

When he was done and had put everything away he collapsed on the couch. He was dead tired but a new feeling of satisfaction slowly spread through him as he looked around his clean house. He liked a tidy environment but somewhere along the way he had stopped taking care of things and lowered his standard of living.

“Well, no more,” Dean said out loud. He decided he would rest for a while and veg out on the couch before he made some dinner for himself. He caught up on a few episodes of Dr. Sexy before his stomach reminded him that he should eat.

He pulled out some chicken and pasta. He threw together a sauce and put it all in the oven. He opened the bag of salad he bought and dumped a healthy portion in a bowl before he drenched it with dressing. He shrugged, figuring the leafy greens were still good even if they were covered in creamy goodness. He ate his salad while the chicken and pasta cooked. When he finished he rinsed his bowl and put it in the dishwasher. Dean frowned realizing he might not have soap for the dishwasher. He looked under the sink and was happy to see that he had some after all. 

He went ahead and filled the compartment in the door before he ran upstairs to gather up some laundry. He quickly stripped his bed and grabbed his towels. He lugged everything down to the small laundry room attached to the kitchen. He tossed them in together and started the machine just as the timer on the over chimed.

Dean was reminded that he enjoyed cooking a lot. As he pulled out the dish the smell of tomatoes and herbs and delicious cheese filled the air. He inhaled heavily and smiled. He had stopped cooking a while ago because it was hard to cook just for himself. As it was, the big dish in front of him was more than twice what he could eat tonight. 

He thought as he plated his food and took it, along with a glass of water, to the sofa. Maybe he could check online and see if there were suggestions for how to cook for one person. Surely, he wasn’t the only single guy who liked to cook.

He started the next episode in the season and watched while he ate. He flipped the laundry, cleaned up the dishes and fished out some old Tupperware for leftovers. Dean made his bed with fresh sheets and decided to watch TV in his bed until he fell asleep.

He sighed as he settled under the comforter with the remote. He paused before he switched on the TV. He had enjoyed the day. He had taken care of his house and got food for himself. His dinner was better than any take out he’d had in a long time and he was glad he had done everything.

Interestingly, he didn’t have any desire to go to the bar tonight. He glanced at the clock. It was just past eight and usually around this time he’d be getting ready to head out to get a drink or two with friends or on his own. He was surprised to realize he was content to stay in and watch TV for once.

His conversation with his brother popped in his head, dimming his happiness for a moment. Maybe Sam was just having a bad day, he reasoned. But Sam had apparently been happy about the new work he was assigned. Dean sighed. He tried to put it out of his mind. He didn’t want to admit how much his brother’s callous words had hurt him.

Dean fell asleep with the TV on and woke up some time later to switch if off before burrowing down in the covers again and drifting off.

***

The next morning as he was brushing his teeth, he looked around the bathroom and paused, toothbrush hanging out of his mouth. The bathroom was nasty. When was the last time he had taken any time to care for his house?

He shook his head and decided that he would clean both bathrooms before his shower. He gathered the same supplies he had used the day before and scrubbed the bathrooms from top to bottom. He wiped the walls and scrubbed the tiles. He bleached the toilet and sink before he swept and mopped the floor. He emptied the trash and organized the drawers and cabinets.

When he stepped under the hot spray he smiled at his clean space. He hummed under his breath as he soaped his body and rinsed his hair. As he reached for a towel he remembered that it was Sunday. The Roadhouse did a brunch on Sunday morning and he hadn’t been in a while. Dean decided he would go. He had missed Ellen and Jo. He tended to keep his bar hopping out of the Roadhouse because Ellen would skin him alive if he was trolling for a hook up there.

Decision made he finished up and headed out the door. He stepped on the creaky step on the way down from the porch and paused. That step had been making noise for as long as he could remember. Dean turned back around to examine it and realized it just needed a little adjustment and a few new nails. He would fix it when he returned.

***

Before his ass had even connected with the barstool Jo was in his face.

“Well look who it is!” she exclaimed loudly in her most sarcastic voice.

“Hey, Jo,” Dean greeted her. He gave her a small smile, knowing it had been too long since he had been in and he deserved whatever she and Ellen both doled out to him.

“Hey, Jo,” she mimicked. Her hands were on her hips and her blond hair was tossed over her shoulder. “Mom!” she yelled louder as Ellen came out of the back and over to the bar. “I think after not seeing Dean at all for a month we should get more than a ‘hey Jo’ don’t you?”

Ellen had made her way back around the bar and stood next to her daughter. She appraised Dean for a few moments before nodding her head. 

“A month Dean,” she told him. 

“I’m sorry,” he told her, contrite. “I’ve been busy, but I’m going to try and be better about stopping by more often.”

Jo snorted and threw a bar towel over her shoulder. “Yea, busy getting busy with every man and woman within a fifty-mile radius,” she retorted.

“Hey!” Dean exclaimed. He looked up sharply into Jo’s face, trying not to show his hurt at her judgement. He may not have been as good at concealing it as he had hoped because something like regret flitted across her face. It was gone in a flash and she rolled her eyes.

“Please,” she said. “Don’t tell me your feelings are hurt and don’t tell me I’m not right.”

“Well, you’re not wrong,” he mumbled as he shredded the napkin in front of him. “But I’m here now, and I’ll try and be better about coming by.”

Jo seemed unsatisfied and was just opening her mouth for another comment when Ellen interrupted her.

“Well, Dean, we’re glad you’re here. We do miss you, and we’d love to see you more often,” Ellen told him.

Jo mellowed out after that and he was able to enjoy a nice breakfast before he got on with his day. He felt motivated to continue getting his house in order so he fixed the broken stair, gave the lawn mower a tune up and cut the grass outside before he headed in. He had just finished dusting and vacuuming the upstairs when his phone rang.

“Dean!” a familiar voice shrieked in his ear. 

“Hey Charles,” he greeted his friend Charlie. He smiled as he sat down on the top of the stairwell to talk with her.

“Are you home? You better be because I’m on my way over with pizza and beer and I want to watch the new Doctor Who. And you better not be shit faced already.”

“Yea, I’m home. Just finishing up some stuff. I need a shower, but I’ll leave the door unlocked and you can come on in.”

“K! Be there in ten!” she squealed and hung up. Dean shook his head at the endless energy his friend had before he hauled himself up and into the shower again.

Charlie had made herself at home by the time he reemerged downstairs. She had a beer in her hand and was scrolling through Netflix on his big screen. He sunk down next to her and pulled her in for a hug.

“Hi,” he said, giving her a kiss on top of her head.

“Hey,” she replied. He let her go and she gestured wit her beer to the pizza and case of beer sitting on the table. “Let’s eat.”

They didn’t bother with plates as they dug in. Dean popped the cap off of one of the bottles and took a drink. He was a little hesitant to start because he was half afraid he really did have a problem. Well, if he couldn’t just have a beer with his pizza then he knew he needed to get his ass to an AA meeting pronto.

Charlie put on her preferred show and they ate and watched in silence. Dean polished off half the pizza and his beer. He sat back, full and relaxed and took stock. He felt good. He eyed the case of beer next to Charlie and was happy to see that he wasn’t consumed with the desire for another. He breathed a sigh of relief and relaxed further, settling into the couch. 

When the show was over Charlie stretched and cut off the TV. She looked around and turned back to him.

“It’s clean in here,” she remarked.

Dean chuckled and nodded his head. “Yea, I cleaned this weekend. You should see the bathroom!”

She laughed with him. “What brought this on?”

Dean let his head roll back and rest on the couch cushion behind him. He stared at the ceiling for a moment before he began to tell Charlie about his wild night on Thursday, or the lack of memory about said night. He only got as far as waking up between two people before she started bitching him out about how irresponsible he was to get himself into that position. She didn’t give him a chance to tell her about how it freaked him out enough that he was pushed into evaluating his life. He eventually just stopped trying to get a word in and let her get it all out.

There was no way he was going to confess to the drunk driving now, even if it was a big part of the reason he was acting differently.

“Ugh, Dean, I can’t believe it! I know we party together and I do my fair share of stupid stuff, but seriously, you need to grow up and figure your shit out.” Charlie was only picking up steam now and Dean was resigned to the fact that they could be here all night. He was surprised to be wrong when she stood up abruptly.

“I have to go,” she told him. He sat up, looking at her in confusion.

“What? Why? I thought we were having a movie night.”

“I just can’t with you right now,” she told him shaking her head. “I’m really angry at you for putting yourself in danger and you just never learn! You don’t think about the consequences and nothing changes for you. I love you and I’m your friend, but I can’t sit here and act like things are ok when they aren’t.” Dean sat in stunned silence as she pulled on her coat and strapped her purse over her body. She slipped on her shoes and stomped back over to the table. She grabbed the mostly full case of beer and glowered at him.

“And you’ve had enough for tonight, too!”

“Charlie, what? I had one beer!” He stood up trying to defend himself but she just shook her head and stormed out of the house, slamming the door. He stood in the middle of the silent living room for a few minutes before he deflated and sunk back onto the couch. He ran his hand through his hair and blew out a breath.

Charlie was right. He had been reckless and stupid and she didn’t even know the half of it. He had been spiraling out of control and had probably hurt a lot of people in the process. He thought back to how upset Ellen and Jo had been that morning and, judging by how Charlie had completely flown off the handle, he had probably disappointed her more than once. 

Everything she had said about him was true. He didn’t want it to be true anymore and he really did want to try and be different. Be better for himself mostly. He was trying, but Charlie’s words ran around in his brain where his brother’s started up again. His good mood plummeted and he ended up leaving the mess and trudging upstairs to bed.

***

“What the hell is this?” Bobby asked in surprise.

“Coffee. And donuts,” Dean told him with a smirk. He had stopped by the bakery down the street on his way in that morning and gotten them both some breakfast. He sipped on his hot coffee smiling at being able to take Bobby unawares.

After the night before, he had woken up with a better outlook. Yes, he had made some terrible mistakes, some very recently. Yes, he had probably hurt people with his drinking and whoring around. Yes, he had hurt himself and could see his behavior ruining his life if he didn’t do something. However, now that he recognized those things he wanted to improve them. He was trying to be a better person. He wanted to act like the adult he was and get his life in order.

One thing that he had come to realize over the course of the last few days was that he was lonely. Terribly lonely. He had watched from the side as his brother found a badass girl, Charlie met the love of her life and even Bobby and Ellen had finally gotten together. He had tried dating a few times after Lisa left but no one had stuck around for more than a few dates. After that, Dean had just decided that hooking up and having a good time was better than the rejection he had faced. It had snowballed from there. 

So here he was, trying to undo some of the damage. He knew that he needed to move slowly. If he tried to overhaul every part of his life in a week he would fail, so he would focus on maintaining daily life for now. Show up to work on time and not hung over. Sleep in his own bed for a decent amount every night. Do his dishes, take out the trash, vacuum the floor. Eat real food. Scale back the drinking. A lot. 

Those things he could do. Once he felt like he had a handle on that he could add something else in. 

“Why?” Bobby asked peering into the bag.

“Just because, old man,” Dean told him turning to go. “Got up early and felt like a healthy dose of sugar, so here we are.”

Bobby grunted but Dean caught sight of his pleased expression as he moved through the doorway. 

***

The week went smoothly for the most part. Dean didn’t make any more major mistakes and the shop ran exceptionally well. Dean wondered how well it could run all the time if he was fully engaged. That made him feel extremely guilty because Bobby had basically given Dean a chance at a decent career and he had been pissing it away.

He managed to cook dinner for himself and clean up after. He finished the few beers he had in the fridge over the course of the week and didn’t feel the need to immediately buy more. In fact, Dean thought he would probably not keep any in the house. He had poured out the liquor that was in the freezer and on the counter already. He decided he would still have a beer if he went out with the guys from the shop or at his parent’s house for dinner, but he shouldn’t be drinking alone.

Dean decided he was ready to take another step, so he plopped on the couch with his laptop on Friday night after he had cleaned up dinner and opened the internet. He typed in a search about ‘cooking for one’ tips first. He found some good ideas like freezing individual portions for nights he didn’t want to cook later or sharing with a coworker.

He googled ‘how to be an adult’ just for fun but quickly stumbled on a few websites that had some good information. He was particularly intrigued by the suggestion to do something you’ve been putting off doing or something you always wanted to try.

Dean wondered…what was something he’s always wanted to try but never had for whatever reason?

A thought came to mind immediately, but he barely acknowledged it. He bit his lip as the thought circled back around and took hold in his brain. He had always wanted to try yoga, but he was afraid that he would not only make a fool out of himself in class, but he would never hear the end of it if his friends and family found out.

He decided that he wasn’t worried about those things anymore and he wanted to try it out. If he couldn’t get passed the embarrassment or it wasn’t for him he would stop and try something else. He searched for studios that had Saturday morning classes and found something close to his house that encouraged people to drop in.

He jotted down the information on a post it and smiled. He was excited.

***

The next day he arrived just before the start of the class at ten. A brunet approach him and introduced herself as Bella, the instructor. The old Dean noticed her curves and luscious hair but the new Dean smiled and introduced himself politely, here only to try to not embarrass himself too badly.

She asked him about his experience with yoga and took a few minutes to help him get set up and give him some information about the class when she found out he was brand new. He thanked her and sat on the mat she provided for him to wait for the class to begin.

Dean startled a little when someone unrolled their mat next to him. Dean turned to greet his new neighbor when the smile froze on his face. Holy shit, that guy was gorgeous.

They stared at each other for a minute, frozen, before the other guy recovered and took his place on the mat and faced Dean. He smiled, a genuine, wide smile that Dean could see in his eyes. Dean returned it without pause and extended his hand.

“Hey, I’m Dean.”

The guy has the most gorgeous blue eyes Dean had ever seen, which were looking down at his hand. He clasped his long fingers around Dean’s and shook hands.

“Hello Dean.” He made eye contact again. “I’m Castiel. You can call me Cas.”

“Nice to meet you, Cas,” Dean returned. They held hands for just a moment too long before they broke apart. Dean glanced around, suddenly nervous now that the lights had been dimmed.

“Are you ok?” Cas asked him. Dean nodded absentmindedly.

“Yea, of course. This is my first class, so,” he bobbled his head around with a laugh. “I’m a little nervous.”

“Well, welcome,” Cas said as he stretched with Bella’s first instructions. “Bela is a wonderful instructor, you’ll do great.”

Dean licked his lips and tried to mirror Cas’ movements. He seemed to do ok and they both got caught up in the movements and didn’t speak again until the class was over.

“I hope to see you again, Dean,” Cas said as he rolled his mat. Dean looked over and smiled at the guy.

“Yea, maybe. I enjoyed it.”

They shared another brief smile before Dean’s attention was pulled by Bella coming to check on him. She asked him how it went and encouraged him to come back again. By the time he had rolled the mat and she had taken it back to store, Cas was gone.

Dean felt a little disappointed, but he shrugged it off. It was nice to meet a cute guy, but he was here to see if he liked yoga as much as he hoped he would, and boy did he. Dean would definitely be back next week. His body felt like it was humming and his muscles burned in the best way. He was acutely aware of where his muscle was lacking after that hour, but somehow it just made it better because he felt like he could target where he needed to shore up his strength.

Riding the endorphin high, he stopped by the grocery store on the way home to do his shopping and restocked his kitchen. He repeated the chores from the previous weekend, noting how much faster it went because he hadn’t waited so long between cleanings. 

Benny called mid afternoon and asked Dean if he wanted to catch the basketball game. Dean agreed and they decided to meet up at the Roadhouse at five. Dean arrived and grabbed a booth before Benny arrived. Jo brought over a pitcher of beer without Dean asking and he was momentarily caught off guard. She put down one glass with the pitcher and Dean smiled at her.

“Hey Jo,” he said.

“Hey Dean. You here to watch the game or are you going to eat too? Mom’s got wings on special,” she told him pointing to the chalkboard above the bar. 

Dean nodded. “I’ll probably order some wings in a bit. Benny’s meeting me too, so another glass would be good for now.”

“Do you want a second pitcher?” she asked. Dean looked at her and he realized that she wasn’t being snarky. There was no judgement on her face or in her posture. Dean was definitely not drinking a pitcher of beer on his own tonight so he shook his head.

“I’ll just wait for Benny and we’ll see how it goes, ok?” he told her. 

“Sure thing,” she said to him as she turned to see to another table. 

Benny always accepted Dean no matter what and they had been buddies since high school. Benny had done his fair share of trolling for ass with Dean before he met his wife, Andrea. They were perfect for each other and she had definitely tempered Benny’s partying and wild side.

Dean relaxed and they watched the game in between eating and catching up. Dean had one beer with his food and asked for water afterwards. Jo gave him a hard time for ordering the water until Benny asked for one too.

“You’re not drinking as much tonight,” Benny remarked as they finished up the wings. Dean threw his wet wipe into the empty basket and took a few healthy sips of the water left in his glass.

“Yea, I’m trying to cut back a bit,” he told his friend. “Thought it was time to figure some shit out, you know?”

Dean looked up at Benny warily trying to gauge his reaction. Benny only smiled and nodded. “Good, cher, that’s good.” He lifted his beer mug to Dean and they clinked the glasses together.

“Thanks man,” Dean said. And he meant it. After the good week he had it was nice to have someone acknowledge that. His friends and family had not been as supportive as he had hoped.

Ellen appeared then. “Hey boys,” she greeted them.

“Hey Ellen, the wings were great tonight,” Dean complimented her. 

“Thank you, honey. I just wanted to see if you were ready for me to call you a cab or if you’re staying for a while.”

Dean and Benny exchanged a glance and Dean frowned, shaking his head. “I’m good, Ellen, we haven’t been drinking that much tonight,” he told her.

She looked at him sharply, assessing him. “Jo told me that you had a pitcher and probably needed a ride since you drove Baby.”

“We split the pitcher, Ellen,” Dean told her.

“And Dean only had one, really, I put away most of it,” Benny chimed in.

“Dean, you know you shouldn’t drive if you’ve been drinking. Baby will be safe here overnight,” she continued.

He shook his head, flushing a little at her insistence that he needed a cab. “Really, El, I’m fine. A beer with food isn’t going to impair me, let alone put me over the limit.”

“Alright, Dean,” she sighed, clearly not believing him. “Be safe and have a good night. See you soon, Benny,” she told them as she moved away from the table.

“What the hell was that about?” Benny asked Dean.

Dean looked down and picked at a loose fingernail. He shook his head trying to gather himself. A few breaths later he was able to speak.

“Apparently I’m the resident drunk now, and even though I can count on one hand the amount of beer I’ve had this week, everyone just assumes I’m wasted all the time.” He huffed. “And if I’m not wasted, I’m looking to get there quick.”

“Aw, cher,” Benny murmured.

Dean waved him off. “It’s ok, man. It’s not like it wasn’t true for a long time. I’m working on it but I can’t expect everyone to jump on board with me the first week, right?”

“Alright, well, just don’t take it too hard, ok?” Benny asked him. Dean agreed and they settled up the bill. They parted ways with a handshake and a hug and Dean drove himself home.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy friends!

**CHAPTER 3 DEAN POV**

The next few weeks went by in the same pattern. Dean continued to eat healthy and sleep properly. He didn’t go out to bars during the week and only met up with friends on the weekends. When he did go out he kept it to small groups or one on one and moderated his alcohol. He was relieved to feel like he could control himself around it and didn’t need to find help. He kept a post it note with AA meetings and times in his junk drawer at home just in case though.

He talked to his parents and brother and updated them on his life, but made no specific announcement about the lifestyle changes, and definitely nothing to Sam about the yoga. The damn kid would be at his house at five every morning so they could bond or whatever if he knew. Dean wasn’t ready for that quite yet.

For now, he was happy with his weekly yoga class next to Cas. The guy had been there every week and they always made sure to put their mats next to each other. They only made small talk but Dean was happy with the pace for now. Cas was hot for sure. Dean would have had to be blind not to see the powerful shoulders and thighs the guy was rocking during the workouts. So far, Dean hadn’t worked up the courage to suggest anything else, but he was hopeful that maybe Cas would be a new friend if he wasn’t in to Dean romantically.

He also felt better than he had in a long time. He could tell that he wasn’t as bloated as he normally was and the indigestion that plagued him often was no longer an issue. Dean felt stronger and more flexible as he continued to attend class on Saturday and supplement several times a week at home. Dean was a little self-conscious about his body. He got enough ass when he wanted it so it wasn’t a turn off for a lot of people, but he had unconsciously created a wardrobe that hid the extra pounds with flannel and dark colors. Dean hoped that the movement would help him get rid of the bit of pudge that had started to creep on his midsection. Dean knew he still looked good and he in no way had a beer gut, but he wasn’t as fit as he used to be and he definitely could stand to lose a few pounds and tighten up his muscles. Yoga seemed to be doing that because his jeans began to loosen after a few weeks.

A month after he woke up in a stranger’s bed he sat down to a family dinner with his parents and Sam and Jess to celebrate Sam’s big case. It was the first time they all could make a night out together. Dean was proud of his brother for his accomplishment. The way Sam made it sound, if he did a good job he could make senior associate the next year. 

Dean had taken extra care to make sure he looked nice for the evening. Since it was to celebrate Sam they were going to some upscale French restaurant. Dean had looked them up online before the dinner to make sure he knew what was on the menu and what he should wear. Dean tried to make sure he did everything he could to make it a nice night for his brother but aside from Jess’ compliment about his sweater and tie, no one noticed. Dean brushed it off. It was, after all, Sam’s night not his.

Dean had a harder time brushing off his mother’s comments about his drinking when he accepted a second glass of wine. Dean had said yes when asked about a glass, and even knew which wine would go best with the meal he ordered. He wasn’t prepared for the glass to be the smallest glass of wine there ever was. He knew it couldn’t have been more than four ounces. When the waiter left to get his second glass, along with Jess’ second glass, his mother looked at him imploringly and stage whispered that maybe he should think about slowing down.

Dean could only blink at her, his fork paused half way to his mouth like a cartoon. When he pointed out that both he and Jess were on their second glass and his brother and father were on their third beer, his mother made a comment about how they could just never be sure with Dean. At that remark Dean had fisted the linen napkin in his lap, sure he was wrinkling it beyond repair. Dean told her that he hadn’t been drinking as much lately and wouldn’t drink if it would make her feel better. She seemed genuinely surprised and then backtracked at his concession telling him that he had already ordered it and it shouldn’t go to waste. When the waiter set the glass in front of him he thanked the man but did not touch it further, leaving it to be poured out after they had left.

As he drove home after an admittedly delicious meal, he felt dejected. He’d spent a lot of time around his friends and family in the last month and it hurt him to realize that either his family would only see what they wanted to see about him, or that they were completely oblivious to who he was and how he was living his life, in spite of Dean showing them and even verbalizing like he done that evening. As he trudged up the stairs to his front door he had to admit that he had most likely caused this by living his life in the bottle for so many years. One month of cleaning up his act wasn’t going to prove anything to them. He would have to work harder to have his parents and brother believe in him again.

The following week Sam called Dean and complained that they hadn’t spent any time together recently and Dean realized it was half way through April already. Dean was excited to get to hang out with his little brother and they made plans to meet up after work on Saturday night. 

Dean spent the day doing his now normal routine of cleaning the house and grocery shopping after yoga. Cas had looked particularly good that morning in a tight blue shirt that brought out the color of his eyes and even tighter black shorts that covered his thighs down to his knees. Dean had almost fallen over when he happened to glance at Cas when they were in Warrior pose. Dean was glad that he had opted to wear loose gym shorts that morning. He felt kinda bad ogling the guy, but he was only human. Besides, he was definitely not the only one checking him out.

Dean was folding the last load of laundry he had done when his cell phone rang. He picked it up and frowned when he saw it was his brother. He quickly glanced at the clock and saw that they were supposed to meet up in an hour. He hoped he hadn’t gotten caught at work. Sam had said that he and the senior associate he was working with were often working extra on Saturdays for the case.

“What’s up bitch?” he answered the phone.

“Jerk don’t answer the phone that way,” was Sam’s greeting back to him.

“Whatever,” Dean responded smiling. “What’s up?”

“Hey, so I’ve been at work all afternoon and we are just wrapping up. Would you mind if I invited my colleague along for dinner? I know I bitched about us not seeing each other and having some just brothers time, but…”

“Sammy, that’s fine. I’m cool with you brining this guy. We still good for seven?” Dean had piled the laundry in the basket and was making his way carefully up the stairs with the phone tucked under his ear. Dean didn’t mind at all, really. This guy was probably pushing forty with a wife and kids at home who just needed a break. Dean could hang for a while.

“Yea, that’s still good. We’ll meet you there, then. Thanks, Dean.”

Dean hung up and put his laundry away before checking himself in the mirror. He fixed his hair and looked in the mirror to see if he needed to shave. He decided the stubble was a sexy look and left it. Just because he wasn’t going to pick someone up didn’t mean he didn’t want to look good. He changed into a clean t-shirt and red flannel before he was ready to go.

They decided to meet at a bar close to Sam’s work. It wasn’t a place Dean went to often, but he had been there several times to meet Sam. He was there first so he grabbed them a booth. He was looking over the extensive micro brews on tap when he caught sight of Sam.

He looked up and lifted a hand in a wave before he stood and grabbed his brother in a hug. Sam hugged him back and pounded him on the back.

“Hey Dean, thanks for waiting,” were his brother’s first words.

“No problem, I really just got here,” he said. Sam stepped back and turned from where he was blocking his guest.

“Dean, this is- “

“Cas!” Dean cried, surprised and a little taken aback.

“Hello Dean,” Cas said. He smiled at Dean and he nearly had a heart attack. He stuffed his hands in his pockets to keep himself from pumping the air in excitement. Cas was Sam’s senior associate? What were the chances? Dean didn’t even know he was a lawyer.

“You two know each other?” Sam asked as they took their seats. Dean slid in the booth and his stomach swooped a little when Cas hung his coat up on the peg beside it and sat down next to him, leaving Sam across from them both.

“Dean is in my Saturday yoga class,” Cas answered matter of factly.

Sam looked incredulously from Cas to Dean. “Since when?”

Dean chuckled at the look on his brother’s face. “About six weeks,” Dean told him.

“Why didn’t you tell me you were doing yoga? Dean, that’s great! I don’t go to the same studio Cas does, but my place has a hot yoga that I just can’t get enough of. It’s three times a week in the mornings. Maybe we could try it out?”

“I’m pretty sure that’s why he didn’t tell you, Sam,” Cas told him dryly. Dean could only nod through his laughter.

“Dude, that is exactly why I didn’t tell you. I knew as soon as you heard I was into it you’d be signing me up for all kinds of crazy shit. I’m just getting started.”

“Yes, you very nearly fell over during Warrior pose this morning. It can’t get much easier than that,” Cas told him. Dean could see a hint of a smile in the corner of his mouth and he knew he was being teased. Dean didn’t know if he was being teased because Cas thought he really had almost fallen over or he had caught him checking out his body.

“Well, sometimes distractions happen,” he replied coolly as he leaned back against the booth. He watched Cas’ face carefully and he definitely saw a smile that time.

“What distractions are there in yoga class?” Sam asked.

“Oh, you might be surprised, Sammy. You might be surprised.” 

Sam looked confused and he opened his mouth to say something more but Dean was saved by a waitress coming to take their order. When she left the conversation shifted. Sam asked after Bobby.

“He’s fine. You know him, nothing slows him down,” Dean said. He turned to Cas to explain. “Bobby is my dad’s best friend and my boss. He owns Singer Salvage and Mechanics over on High Street.”

Cas nodded thoughtfully. “I’ve never been there, but I think I know where it is. Are you a mechanic?” he asked.

Dean shook his head as the waitress put their drinks in front of them. Dean had started with a beer and thought he might have one now and one later with dinner. He took a sip and savored the taste of the microbrew. It was cold and crisp.

“I was, but now I run the shop,” Dean said. “I started working there in high school and Bobby made me the manager a few years ago.”

“That’s a skill set that I completely lack,” Cas tells him.

Sam snorts across the table. “You could say that again,” he tells Dean. “Cas here can’t change a tire _or_ his oil.”

Dean gaped at him for a moment. Cas shrugged and sipped his beer. “It’s true, but I never had anyone to teach me, so I just take it to a shop when I need to.”

“Dude, you should bring it to me,” Dean said without thinking. “I mean,” he blushed as he stammered. “I could give you a deal at least. Or I could teach you those things,” he adds.

Cas raised his eyebrows at Dean and looked at him for a long moment. “I might take you up on that offer,” he said. 

Dean couldn’t help but smile at that. 

They order food and Sam and Cas talked about the case. Cas included Dean and gave him some backstory and details that he could share. Dean appreciated Cas pulling him in and including him where his brother had brushed him off before. They talked about yoga and music and the night was over way too soon.

“Well guys,” Sam said as he threw down his napkin. “I’ve got to get going. Jess is home so I’m going to head out.”

“Thank you for inviting me tonight, Sam,” Cas told him. Dean nodded in agreement.

“Are you guys coming or no?” Sam asked as he stood.

Before Dean could even think of a reason to ask Cas to stay with him Cas smoothly covered it.

“I think I’m going to have some dessert before I go.” He turned slightly to face Dean. “Are you in a hurry?”

Dean can feel his face flush but shook his head. “No, I’m good. Not in a hurry at all.” Cas gave Dean a slow, sexy smile before he turned back to Sam.

“I’ll see you on Monday,” he told him.

Dean tried to keep from bouncing on the bench he was sharing with Cas but he was excited. He couldn’t remember the last time he felt this crazy about someone. And it seemed like Cas might be feeling some of the same.

Sam narrowed his eyes at Dean for a moment before he nodded. “Okay, well, you guys enjoy. Dean,” he added as she shrugged on his coat, “call a cab, ok?” He indicated Dean’s bottle of beer that sat on the table. Dean frowned at him in confusion.

“Uh, ok Sam. If I need one, I’ll call, I promise,” he told him. Sam seemed to still be reluctant to leave, but he had no more excuses to stay so he bid them good night and left.

“Sam was acting very strange,” Cas remarked, drawing Dean’s attention back to him. Dean gave him a sad smile.

“Yea, he gets that way sometimes,” Dean told him. He could tell that Cas wanted to ask more but he let the subject drop.

“So, do you want dessert?” he asked reaching over Dean to grab the small menu against the wall. Dean couldn’t quite suppress a shiver as Cas’ chest brushed his arm. It seemed that Cas noticed because he raised one brow. Dean held his eye contact for a moment and watched Cas track the movement of his tongue when he licked his lips. Cas pulled it back across the table and put the menu between the two of them.

“Yea, that sounds good. What looks good to you?” he asked, thankful for the subject change.

“Everything,” Cas joked. “I have a terrible sweet tooth. That’s why I go to yoga.” He winked at Dean and smiled. Dean nearly fell over again.

“Ah, yea, yea, I like sweets too,” he agreed. 

They end up ordering two things to share together and Dean learned that Cas is Castiel Novak, senior associate in Adler, Novak and Mullen Associates. The Novak being for his father, of course. He has two brothers, Gabe, who is older than he is by two years and another, Michael, who is older by four years. Michael is also a lawyer but Gabe owns a bakery in town. Cas grew up in Lawrence and went to private school before going to Stanford for college. He’s twenty-nine, just like Dean and he takes a yoga class almost every day to manage the stress of his job and his sugar consumption.

Dean told Cas that he also grew up in Lawrence but he and Sam went through public schools. Dean got his associates from the local community college but didn’t pursue a bachelor’s degree. He talked about Sam, who is four years his junior and his parents who still live in the same house he was born in. He told Cas about restoring the Impala and how proud he is that he’s kept her so many years.

As the night wound down and their plates were cleared away Cas turned to Dean with a more serious expression on his face. Dean could see he was nervous about what he wanted to say so he tried to smile and encourage Cas to talk.

“I have had a nice time tonight, Dean,” he told him.

“Me too Cas, I’m glad we stayed for dessert,” Dean agreed.

“Would you like to go out again?” Cas asked.

Dean let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding and nodded. “I’d love to, Cas,” he said.

Cas seemed relieved and chuckled. “I’ve been working up to asking you out for the last several weeks at the studio. Every week I think I’m going to do it and then I chicken out.”

“No way,” Dean exclaimed. He decided to be bold. “You know I almost fell over today because I caught sight of how fucking alpha you looked this morning, right?”

Cas’ eyes widened for a moment before he smiled smugly. “I had hoped that was the case,” he told Dean. 

Dean bit his lip and blushed when Cas pressed his thigh against Dean’s on the seat.

“Well,” Dean practically yelled, “I guess we better head out.” 

Cas raised one eyebrow at him letting him know that Cas knew Dean was flustered. “Do you need a cab? Or a ride?” Cas asked.

Dean looked at him questioningly for a moment before it clicked. “Oh, no, I’m good. My baby is just outside.”

It was Cas’ turn to look confused and Dean sighed internally cursing his brother. “Sam just wanted to make sure I didn’t drink too much to drive home,” he finally said.

Cas looked down at the table where three bottles of beer still sat, one for each of them. “You only had one beer, though, same as each of us,” Cas said. 

Dean rubbed the back of his neck and closed his eyes for a moment. When he opened them, Cas was staring right into his face. “Yea,” he said. Might as well get it over with. If Cas was going to run for the hills Dean would rather it be sooner than later. “I, uh, used to drink and sleep around. Like, a lot,” he told Cas.

“Used to?”

“Yea, I’ve been working on dialing it back for a bit now. Had a sort of wake-up call one day and realized that I didn’t want to live like I was anymore, so I’m on a path to self-improvement,” he replied.

Cas nodded thoughtfully. “You look good, Dean,” he said softly. “And good for you for recognizing you wanted to change your life and following through with it. That is a very difficult thing to do and often people fail.” He paused and frowned again, glancing back to Sam’s empty seat. “Does Sam know about your change of lifestyle?”

Dean pressed his lips together and shook his head. “I haven’t made a formal announcement or anything, no, but I’ve told them. I gotta tell you, man, it’s drastically different from what it was before, so they should be seeing it, too.”

“They? Should be?” Cas asked, catching the important parts Dean wasn’t saying.

“Yea, Sam, my folks, some of my friends. No one has really paid attention to the fact that I’m sober and celibate now. I feel like they should though. I feel like they should see the things that I’ve changed. Like you said, it’s fucking hard sometimes, but I’m doing it. And they aren’t planning interventions or anything extreme like that, but it’s overt things, like Sam making sure I know to call a fucking cab,” Dean said. He didn’t tell Cas about the last time he should have called a cab. It was the first time they had really met and talked after all. No need to spill all the dirty secrets at once.

Cas narrowed his eyes at Dean’s words. “You should say something to them if that’s how you feel, Dean.”

Dean just shrugged. “It is what it is, Cas. It’s fine. I’m sure in another few weeks they’ll catch on and we’ll make a joke about how they were oblivious to things right in front of them.” Dean took a breath and shook off his feelings. “So, about that date next weekend.”

Cas smiled at him again and Dean’s brain stuttered. “I was thinking that after our yoga class on Saturday, maybe we could walk to the farmer’s market one block over and walk around. They have lots of good food and local artisans set up booths to sell things. It’s nice. I often walk over on Saturdays because Gabe does a booth for his bakery.”

Dean returned Cas’ smile. “I’ve never been. I would love to do that. I’ve just gotten back into cooking again and I bet I could find some nice produce and things.”

“Most definitely,” Cas agreed.

They grabbed their coats and walked outside. It had gotten chilly as the April night settled in, and Dean pulled his jacket closer to his body while he popped the collar up on his neck. Cas walked with him over to Baby and Dean introduced him. Cas responded the way Dean had always hoped his partners would respond. Cas gently ran his hands over the hood and bumper before he peered in the window.

“I’ve never seen a car like this up close,” he told Dean. “My parents are more of the brand-new top of the line kind of people.” Dean laughed as Cas came back around to the driver’s side where Dean was standing. “I know nothing about cars in general and even less about antiques, but I can tell she’s a beautiful machine and you must take exceptional care of her.”

“Thanks, Cas,” Dean breathed feeling another blush warm the back of his neck. If Cas kept on being this perfect Dean didn’t know what he was going to do.

Cas just smiled at him and moved to open the door. Dean slid into the driver’s seat and Cas leaned down so he could see Dean.

“Maybe we should exchange phone numbers?” Cas asked as he pulled out his phone.

“Yea,” Dean agreed reaching into his own pocket. “That’s a good idea.”

Cas handed Dean his phone to punch in his number and then he texted himself. He double checked his phone when it chimed and smiled. He returned Cas’ phone to him, his fingers tingling where they brushed.

“I’ll see you Saturday,” Cas said to him. Dean nodded and Cas shut the door. He backed up onto the curb and waved to Dean before heading to his own car. 

Dean drove home in silence, thinking about how perfect that night was. He couldn’t wait to get to next Saturday.


End file.
